Subtle
Full Member
Dynamic Sentai Vic Riot!
Posts: 716
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Post by Subtle on Mar 22, 2007 19:51:07 GMT -5
Stainless steel shimmering, Immortal world shuddering. Holy blood is spilling, Torn wings are fluttering,
Skies filled with lightning, Violence and thunder. Yin meeting yang, Tears heaven asunder.
Belief has torn them, Jealousy and greed. For a man who needs guidance, Is no follower of creed.
Squabbling and quarreling, Confused and distraught, The zealots don’t realize What good has been wrought.
Though death and carnage Filled the mournful days A dozen men walked Untouched by the haze
Those with no guide No book and no idol Abstained from the war And took a new title
Untouched by fanatics By temptations of Eden These men lived for virtue In the kingdom of reason
No puppeteer was needed to keep them at bay. they did it themselves, let virtue lead the way
Steadfast in adversity, In the hour eleven The god they denied Sees his children in heaven.
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Son of Marth
Full Member
also known as Dark Samus
Posts: 1,043
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Post by Son of Marth on Jul 14, 2008 23:42:14 GMT -5
i cant believe no-one has commented on this... this poem is beautiful subtle... it actually made me stop and think about a few things.... thank you for posting this...
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Post by Beanybag on Jul 14, 2008 23:49:00 GMT -5
I'm just not a fan of meter, stanzas, rhyming, and the like...
I like free style, descriptive/metaphorical poems. D:
Personal thing =x
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Post by Ninmast on Jul 15, 2008 19:04:15 GMT -5
As a poem, it's very well done, very well written, very descriptive, though it feels a little lacking in the beginning, like you had trouble getting going.
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